I like to set expectations. If you have wandered across this blog expecting a Martha Stewart wannabe, keep on wandering, friend. That is NOT ME. I mean, I make edible food. Most of the time. (Thanks, Food Network!) But you know those moms that show up at their kid’s bus stop, looking all polished, with not a hair out of place? The ones that are looking like extras at some Ambercrombie and Fitch photo shoot? Yeah, that’s not me. I’m the lady in sweats and a pink fuzzy robe. Muck boots complete the ensemble, and I’m am trying my best to inconspicuously pick Cheerios out of my hair.
I have five children in the home. Plus the husband. I love him dearly. When I’m mad at him, I picture violently ending him and getting away with it. Sometimes, I feel like my sanity is hanging by a thread. Those are the good days. On the bad days, I know I’m a sad sack.
You know those children that rarely misbehave? Those aren’t mine. In fact, as I type this, I am collecting iPhones and iPods. You know why? Because if I don’t, those little buggers take two and a half hours to do dishes. They run off to distant corners of the house, searching for WiFi, so they can facebook and look at Lego “creations”. You know those moms that have Consequences Charts and say things like, “I’m really disappointed with the poor choices you are making. Can you turn it around before you get a consequence?” I start off like that, but then I notice the zombie look, and end up saying, “Look! If you don’t knock it off, I’m getting nekkid. Right here, right now!” Horrified looks and scrambling to obey. I count it as a win.
I am a horse fanatic. I have some definite opinions about the horse world. I have to stay away from forums because I read some of the crap there, and I feel like I am forming ulcers. I share because it makes me feel less alone when others snark, and because I am interested in educating and learning more.
Now that we got the preliminaries out of the way, we can get to business. I might drop an F-bomb. I might offend. I will never sugar coat though. This is an honest look into my world.